Top Ten Things That Will Make Me Instantly NOT Want To Read A Book

Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly meme created by The Broke and the Bookish.

Bad research

Unless you’re inventing your own world check that the locations and facts you quote are correct. The internet is a great help but it’s always good to use more than one source. Seriously sometimes I just want to bang may head against the wall…

Research is your friend.

Bad research part 2: Crappy Translations

If you’re going use another language and aren’t fluent find someone who is. Don’t online-translate or use a person who “learned a bit at school”. Very few things irate me as much as finding bad German in books.

Stickers, Blurbs, Quotes aka the “If you loved…”

I don’t want stickers on my books anyway (especially when they’re tricky to get off) but there are two that almost always guarantee me not even checking the blurb:

sticks

…if you loved Twilight” Well I didn’t so I’m not going to like this right?
The New Hunger Games” Similar problem to the previous, although I really enjoyed The Hunger Games (still need to read the other 2 at some point).
If I’ve already read The Hunger Games why read a new version of the same story? It’s not the intention here I realise that but “the new” to me just sounds like the characters will have different names while still following the same overall plot. I want to spend my money on something I haven’t read before. And then we have: “Exciting new trilogy” I do read trilogies/series and I’m not saying they can’t be amazing but sometimes it feels like there is a standalone drought. I’m much more likely to take a chance on a book if I know I don’t have to invest in another two on the back of that.

And the two words that nearly always kill it:
sticks 2

Spelling mistakes

I’m not a great speller. If I can spot the mistake then it’s really bad.

Being talked down to by the author

Your readers are not dumb. Do not treat us as such.

Animal cruelty

The only book (which I will not name) that has the honour never going past the first chapter contains the frozen chicken rape story. Not kidding. Basically the book is about creative writing class and in the first chapter the students discuss their short stories, one of these being the chicken. I stopped reading straight away.

“Protective” aka domineering love interests

Having someone control another is not ok by putting it the “protective” heading. I’m sorry but I take real issue with one character telling someone how to act, who their friends can be, etc. because they are “protecting” them.

You can also add: “but mysterious [insert-random-guy-name] notices her” and “torn between guy1 & guy2 / destiny” *snores*

Stupid Characters

There is a difference between “I’ve never seen a blender so I’ll put my hand in it” and “I know what a blender is and I know it’ll hurt me but I’ll still put my hand in it”.
A little common sense goes a long way. It’s not good when the lasting memory I have is the thought: “You are kidding me? Right? Please be kidding me…”

The “Hello, I met you less than 5 minutes ago but I’d die for you” Insta-Love

I’ll admit I’m not a fan of insta-love but some authors do manage to pull it off so I will give books a chance. You’re going need longer than 5 minutes though no matter how “destined” this relationship is. At least learn something of the other person before jumping of that cliff.

And…. (this should have been point 1 but how do you even?!)

This could have had so many headings and I’m not going to essay all my feelings. This tweet is just one of too many examples.

Every single time I see a glimmer of hope that we’re moving forward it gets pushed back. So far back. I just want to cry. Every.Single.Time.

What about you?

 

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10 thoughts on “Top Ten Things That Will Make Me Instantly NOT Want To Read A Book

  1. Oh man, the ‘for fans of’ thing really bothers me! So many times, it’s ruined my expectations of a book, and from those recommendations, you’d think no one had published a book since The Fault in Our Stars! – Maddie x

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